Closing Time

I don't have to go home but I can't stay here.

So, I've been looking forward to this day for a very long time.  Mostly because I really wanted to use the lyrics by Semisonic as a blog title, but also I am just super ready to be done.

Good news!  I am done!

After graduation this weekend, I'll go home for a week or so, and then up to Alaska.

I'll stay for sure through the end of the season, and depending on how the company does, I will be hired on salary year round.

At least I have a plan I guess.

Also, I guess i sort of suck at that whole 'goodbye' thing.  I really have to build myself up to it if I'm going to be emotional at all.  Usually my farewells are sort of a "I'm never going to see you again, but its been fun.  Here's a hug-You've been great.  And if you never hear from me, don't worry too much--I don't stay in touch with anyone really.  Also don't be offended that I'm not crying.  I only do that in movies."

I suppose I'm just one of those people, that when something ends, it's over, life is different, I adapt, and then it's like life has always been that way.  I don't get reminiscent very often.  And only rarely nostalgic.

So let this be the message to all:  you've been great, really, and don't be offended if I'm the worst goodbye-r on the planet.  And remember, we'll always have Provo.

Laters.

It's grass-tastic!

Or so says the packaging on a bag of questionable candy my roommate received.

Edible Easter grass.  made in Germany... where else.  The interesting thing about it is, that edible is the best word to describe it.  It isn't delicious, or sugary, or even terrible.  It's just sort of meh...edible.  But I guess:

Edible Easter Grass

meh... it's edible 

just isn't as catchy as:

Edible Easter Grass

It's Grass-tastic!

So you eat one, and it tastes sort of like foam.  Sort of really like foam.  But it has just enough hint of green apple that you feel like you're eating something.  And so you have another.

Good news--the entire massive package is only 100 calories.  It has no fat, no sugar, no cholesterol, or anything else really... except for <1g of fiber.  Begging the question, what the heck is even in these things?

Glad you asked.

Ingredients: potato starch, corn starch, modified corn starch, and artificial flavors.

Artificial?!  Gasp.  Could've fooled me.

Prose and Khans

There were a lot of factors to consider.  After all on the one hand we have things like history, film, fiction, and this blog.  And on the other people like Chaka, Ghengis, Shao,... and the Wrath of...

So you can see it was a difficult decision.  One full of sensitive, intensely-felt promises*, and of course murderers and villains.  And to be perfectly honest I still haven't 100% confirmed it or worked out all the kinks--but so far it feels good.  And frankly thats all I really need in life.

The moral of the story is I got offered a full-time job in Alaska and I think I'm taking it.

*Like the prose written by George Peppard's typewriter in Breakfast at Tiffany's

I'm so vague--you probably think this blog is about you

So, the time has come.

My roommates and I have finally created a pizza blog wherein we divulge our expert opinions and connoisseur-like evaluations.  If you want to be blown away, or just get a fun idea idea full of pizza-related goodness, you should visit it.

Its basically the best thing since the stuffed crust.

Wheel in the sky keeps on turning

Fashion, like most things, tends to repeat itself.  Whenever I point something out that I like to my mother, she often responds with a, "I used to have a shirt just like that--I should have saved it."  Yes, yes you should have.  Nevertheless I was unprepared.  Unsuspectingly and innocently online shopping.

When I realized, the time we have all been dreading is now at hand.

So normally I'm all about the Crew.  I was looking at their sweaters today when I found this little gem:

Yes, it is official.  We are returning to the era of tiered minis, and pink and black combos.  This was a devastating realization even though I knew it had to happen eventually.

At least I can be grateful she isn't sporting a new set of shoulders.

Best ad today

We're not saying this body wash will make your man smell into a romantic millionaire jet fighter pilot, but we are insinuating it.

Also, I wish I were on a horse.

All roads lead to the Temple

So, two missionaries walk into a bar... woah wrong story.

So two missionaries tract into this woman and start talking to her, but she tells them it isn't a good time, and asks them to come back next week.  There's a guy in the apartment and the missionaries ask if he'll be there next week too.  He agrees.

Next week, the missionaries are back, the two people are super gung-ho about the gospel, and commit to being baptized.  But the missionaries are all, "yeah, but you need to get married before you're baptized, so come at five and the Bishop will marry you, and at six you'll get baptized."  They agree and everyone goes their separate ways.

It's baptism day.  The couple is late and the missionaries are worried, did they forget, did they bail?  So they go out to the parking lot to see the couple arguing.  Instead of interrupting, they just wait inside to see what happens.  After a few more minutes, the couple comes in, gets married, and gets baptized.

They became the perfect mormon couple, accepting callings, fellowshipping, you name it.  At their year mark, they meet with the Stake President to get interviewed for their temple recommends.  They pass the interview, and afterwards, the husband asks a question:

"Something I don't understand, why did we have to get married?"

Awkward pause "Well, you see it's not entirely appropriate to be living together when you get baptized."

Another awkward pause "But we weren't living together.  I was her landlord and I was just there collecting the rent."

Apparently, all roads lead to the temple.  Thank you ward conference.